A year ago this month

As of about a week ago (April 19^th), Tim and I have been living with my parents for 1 year.  Yep.  1 year of crazy transition.  So far….the clock is still ticking…..  When we moved in we thought we’d be there 4 months tops.  Certainly not until Christmas, we’d say to each other….Well, God had different plans. 

So even with the coming of another beautiful MN Spring, April is a bittersweet month for us this year.  We are thankful for God’s provision as we continue to pray about direction.  We are also thankful that our ongoing needs keep us seeking Him, while Tim looks for full time work.  God is teaching us the painful lesson about finding satisfaction in Him and nothing else. 

Although there are lots of reasons why we still long to have our own place again, I think we are getting used to living with my parents.  There are a lot of benefits to multi-generational living and we are really thankful to have parents that can help us out in this way.  Truthfully, I don’t know what we’d do if we couldn’t live with them.  We don’t even have enough income to even rent out part of our own duplex!

We sure don’t know what’s coming next, but one thing we do know, the longer it takes for us to finally get settled again, the  more committed we are to what God is calling us to, no matter what.  And for right now, knowing that He knows what that is, even when we don’t, that’s enough for us.

A post the ladies can appreciate

Today I realized that I am proud of myself.  (With a little help from Amanda J)  I am an emotional eater for SURE.  I love, love, love food.  I love to read about it, look at it, buy it, prepare it, talk about it, and eat it.  And this is especially true when I am feeling down.  The past 9 months of this crazy transition time have been an emotional rollercoaster leading to little bouts of depression for both of is.  So I am proud of myself that in the midst of it all, I have been able to lose some weight.  If you are an emotional eater, you know how profound this is!  Some of it was baby weight and needed to go and some of it had nothing to do with Jackson, but still needed to go!  I have been watching what I eat and working out, but I think some of it was that fact that I can control what I am eating even when I can’t control anything else in my life right now.  At least it’s a small victory in this season of discouragement J   

Pushin Broom

Encouragement sometimes comes from strange places.  One of my (Tim) all time favorite bands is Tourniquet, a metal band that hit the scene around 1990 and made some amazing music over the years.  They are mostly known for their incredible drummer, deep lyrics which were often inspired by medical terminology, and a singer with good enough diction to actually understand him.  One of my favorite songs is "Pushin Broom", from their 1995 album Vanishing Lessons.  It is a reminder to be faithful in the little things before we can expect God to give us bigger things.  The song says that sometimes we have be content to push a broom and not try to speed along God's plan for us while the voice in our heads tells us that we are wasting our lives.  Only when we ignore that voice and seek to be faithful with what we know God has for us will we be able to take that next step.  I feel like that song speaks to my situation.  Working at Costco is a blessing and I am grateful to have some income but I am also longing for the day when I am back in full time work that I find more fulfilling.  However, I must constantly remind myself not to look ahead but to seek the Lord now and enjoy what he has for me today.  The extra time with my family is a true blessing and someday I'll look back at that with gratitude.  In the meantime, I will work on being faithful and keep pushing that broom.

Easter

When I (Tim) was in high school, I started the tradition of listening to the song, "It is Finished" by Petra, every Good Friday.  Last year I finally switched songs to "Beautiful, Scandalous Night" by Bebo Norman and Leigh Nash.  Those songs bring me to the place of the Passion, where Jesus went through pain and death for me.  I am still amazed that He loved me enough to do that.  It really is amazing.  I am so glad that the story did not end on Friday.  As the old preacher said, "it's Friday.  But Sunday's comin!"  He is risen!  He is risen indeed!